Mind wandering or overthinking?

Critical thinking is thinking about your thinking, while you're thinking, in order to make your thinking better.

- Richard Paul

The term overthinking has never sat right with me. To my mind, I don't know how you can measure exactly what is over, or indeed under, thinking. And who decides this measure? There is just thinking. The mind thinks and the mind doesn't turn off. It is not meant to until our days on this beautiful planet are done. Like a computer our minds go in to standby or sleep modes when we aren't engaging in active thought. They are still running in the background. This happens whether we like it or not. This is mind wandering. As I said in my previous post, this is a function that helps us makes sense of the world and our experience in it. When we are asleep this is the function of dreaming.

The mental health world and pop psychology discourages and pathologises mind wandering, calling it overthinking (although interestingly the term isn't listed in the American Psychological Association Dictionary of terms) and painting it as something to be avoided. We are told that our mental distress comes from thinking. We hear phrases like, “You’re overthinking”, “Put your thoughts on trial”, “Don’t trust your mind it can lie to you”, “You aren’t your thoughts”, or “That’s an intrusive thought”.

The modern world also discourages mind wandering, especially when our mind wanders in to uncomfortable territory or painful memories. Again we hear phrases like "Just let it go", or "Stop worrying about it". We have become so uncomfortable with discomfort that we try to avoid it any way possible. Only Good Vibes are welcome.

Consumerism sells us distractions and wants to keep us away from our thoughts. Here’s the next bright thing for you to buy and it will make you happy. Consumerism doesn’t want us to think or to challenge. It wants us to buy without thinking.

I believe that the term overthinking is used to discourage us from engaging in processes of contemplation that can lead to problem solving because we have to move through discomfort before we find resolution and relief. In my experience, as a counsellor, most people report that they are "over" thinking because they have attempted, without success, to shut their thinking down. When they can't shut it down, anxiety kicks in and they feel there is something wrong with them. In these cases, the thinking usually relates to something uncomfortable or to an unresolved problem. Rarely, if ever, do people believe they are overthinking when the subject matter is pleasant.

Ultimately, what happens when we attempt to stop thinking about uncomfortable things is that the "over" thinking continues. What we resist persists.

What I have learned is that our mind settles when we listen to our thoughts, when we let our minds wander and when we stop criticising ourselves for not being able to stop our thinking. Mind wandering is where problem solving happens. In Internal Family Systems (IFS) we know this process as parts of us trying to get our attention so they can be helped. Ignoring or suppressing these parts is what creates tension, pressure and overwhelm.

When we don’t engage our thoughts we also limit our critical thinking. We don’t grow our capacity to think, to question, to challenge. We become lemmings and we follow the next big bright thing right over a cliff.

Obviously, this is not straight forward with serious mental illness. Here an individual requires support and guidance to engage with troubling thoughts and any associated emotional distress or traumatic memories. In this case I always recommend the engagement of a trained professional.

I encourage you to let your mind wander. Breathe through any resistance you feel and see what happens. Hear from the parts of you that are waiting for you to notice them. Let your mind be open to hearing differing perspectives and notice when, and why, this feels challenging. Let your thoughts grow and expand your view of the world. It can be a much prettier outlook. Yet know, if you find that your internal landscape isn't providing that pretty outlook, it's OK to seek help to find it.